GENESIS 6, or, "You want me to build what?"

A heroic race of half-angel half-humans are created (maybe), humanity falls into corruption, and God commissions Noah to build a really big boat.

Here's an origin story ripped out of the pages of a Marvel comic...

Born out of the forbidden love of fallen angels and beautiful yet corrupt human women, a mysterious and heroic race of giants known as the "Nephilim" patrol the lawless land of a new and increasingly evil world.

That's not too far from what the Bible says at the beginning of Genesis 6 - "The Nephilim were on the earth in those days-and also afterward-when the sons of God went to the daughters of men and had children by them. They were the heroes of old, men of renown."

This passage requires some context and translation. "Nephilim" can be loosely translated into "giants", though it is arguable as to whether this refers to someone who is literally gigantic in size, or more figuratively gigantic in intelligence or personality.

"Sons of God" can also be interpreted in at least two ways. First, the phrase could be taken to mean "angels", since the phrase "Sons of God" is used again in the book of Job to explicitly mean angels. www.rationalchristianity.com tells us that in both cases of Job and Genesis, early Jewish writers interpreted "Sons of God" to mean angels.

The second way the phrase can be interpreted is as "Sons of Seth". The logic here is that the sons of Seth were godly men who followed God's path. Contrastly, the cursed sons of Cain were not godly, so people who interprete Gen 6 in this way believe that the phrase "daughters of men" refer to the daughters decended from Cain.

So one could either read the "Nephilim" as being a giant super-race of heroic angel/human half-breeds, or simply virtuous men descended from Seth.

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For reasons that are not too clear, the world starts to increase in wickedness and violence. God sees this, becomes unhappy and decides to press the giant reset button in the sky by summoning a world-wide flood. I'd like to point out here that God becomes upset with man's violence, and then kills all but eight of them as punishment.

God decides that Noah and his family are the only people righteous enough to carry on the human race. He tells Noah to build a giant ark that will house two of every kind of animal, protecting them from the impending flood.

Have you ever wondered to yourself, if Noah's ark had to carry two of every kind of animal in the world, how big would the ark need to be? Well, the Bible answers this question very specifically: 450 feet long, 75 feet wide and 45 feet high, with lower, middle and upper decks. I'm too lazy to do the math myself, but www.christiananswers.com says that's 100,000 square feet, or more floor space than 20 standard size basketball courts.

Would that be enough to house two kinds of every animal? I suppose you could figure out the mathematics to support that (like this), but it seems unlikely to me, unless you account for some kind of space-saving divine intervention on board.

Pop Culture References to Gen 6: Evan Almighty, a SNES game that no one has ever played.

GENESIS 5, or, "You don't look a day over 400"

We get a quick genealogy lesson that leads us from Adam to Noah, and learn that people back in old Biblical times must have really taken good care of themselves.

In this chapter we trace Adam's lineage down to Noah. It turns out that Adam was Noah's great - great - great - great - great - great - great - grandfather. For anyone who cares, here's the exact lineage:

Adam - Seth - Enosh - Kenan - Mahalalel - Jared - Enoch - Methuselah - Lamech - Noah

We also learn these people's ages as we go down the list. It turns out that people back then lived a lot longer than people do now. Adam lived a whopping 930 years, and ol' Methuselah tops everyone by living to be 969. For people worried about having kids later in life, like in their 40's or 50's, have no fear... Seth fathered Enosh when he was 105, and Lamech had Noah when he was 182.

These passages in the Bible are what Young Earth Creationists point to when they claim that the Earth is only 6000 years old. Why go through the trouble of carbon-dating fossils when all you have to do is count up how long people lived in the Bible?

I went to a Creationist website (www.creationists.org) for answers. How can the Earth only be 6000 years old despite the mountains of scientific evidence that state otherwise? If Adam, Eve and Cain were the only people on Earth at the beginning, then where did Cain's wife come from, who is mentioned in Gen 4? Was everyone incestuous at the beginning of time, and if so, doesn't that contridict God's laws?

Unfortunately, the answers given in the FAQ section of creationists.org did not satisfy me. The arguments use circular reasoning, begging the question by assuming what they claim to be proving.

If you put enough effort into it, you can twist the words of the Bible, along with your own logic, to defend anything the Bible says as being the literal truth, the way creationists.org works hard to prove that Cain's wife was Adam's daughter, and that incest was okay back then because it was before God restricted it in Leviticus.

When I consulted www.biblestudy.com about the question of Adam's inexplicably long life, it told me that:

"After the [Biblical] flood the earth was completely different than the earth before. There were widespread global differences. These would include changes in the climate, composition of the atmosphere, hydrologic cycle, geologic features, cosmic radiation reaching the earth, ozone concentration, ultra violet light, background radiation, genetics, diet, and a host of other subtle and/or profound chemical and physiological changes. These changes caused a rapid decline of the longevity of post flood humanity."

Uh-huh...

Bible literalists always seem outraged when people (other Christians, even) suggest that the Bible is speaking in symbolic language. To them, if the Bible says Adam lived to be 930 years, then Adam lived to be 930 years, and they'll figure out ways to argue the logic of that. To me though, it seems a more egregious offense to the Biblical text to so forcefully twist its words around in an effort to explain away the inconsistencies and anamolies it contains.

It makes more sense to me that God intended the Bible (or at least at this point Genesis) to be read as an allegory, rather than as a literal text that needs to be supplimented by countless rationalizations and apologias.

Pop References to Gen 5: Okay, this is hardly a "popular" culture reference, but I still thought it was interesting. There's an organization called The Methuselah Foundation that holds a scientific competition each year "designed to draw attention to the ability of new technologies to slow and even reverse the damage of the aging process, preserving health and wisdom in a world that sorely needs it." The foundation is named after Methuselah, the oldest person mentioned in the Bible.

More Pop References to Gen 5 (Added 7/3/07): I stumbled across a news article that described an old episode of the original Star Trek titled "Requiem for Methuselah" about Kirk falling in love with an android created by a five-thousand year old man named Flint, who has also been known as Leonardo DiVinci and William Shakespeare throughout his lifetime. Both Kirk and Flint want the robot for themselves, she is torn between the two of them, resulting in her short circuiting.

GENESIS 4, or, "Kinda makes those indian burns your big bro gave you not such a big deal"

Adam and Eve have children, taking the entire human population up to a record breaking 4. One of those children kills the other one, knocking it back down to three. I try to ignore the logistics of how a father, a mother, and one son will go on to populate an entire species.

Adam and Eve give birth to two children - Cain the older and Abel the younger. Chores are quickly handed out. Abel is in charge of the family's flocks, and Cain is in charge of working the soil. Both of them bring offerings to God, Cain brings some fruit, and Abel fat portions from the firstborne of his flock. God likes the fat portions better, and thus sibling rivalry is born.

Cain is upset, and God tries to console him by saying that as long as he is good, he will be accepted. Cain ignores this advise, takes his brother out into a field and kills him.

God being omnipotent and all figures out what Cain has done and curses him, telling him that he will no longer be able to grow crops (a big deal back then), and that he will forever be a restless wanderer. Cain tells God that this punishment is too much for him to bear, that people everywhere will want to kill him. So God agrees to put a mark on Cain and makes it so if anyone kills him, they will "suffer vengence seven times over". Cain leaves for the land Nod, east of Eden. Adam and Eve have more children, as does Cain.

Something I was unaware of until now is that the "mark of Cain" mentioned in Gen 4 had been widely used to justify various forms of racism. According to Wikipedia, certain (though not all) Christian traditions interpreted the mark of Cain as being expressed by black skin, The mark of Cain doctrine has been used to justify racism, slavery, bans on interracial marriage, and as a way of preventing black people from advancing into certain roles in the chuch. Mormonism has been especially criticized for using the mark of Cain to keep black people from becoming priests, though that ban was lifted in 1978.

I've also heard of Cain's curse being used as an explanation for the origin of vampires, though I think this is a very fringe idea.

But let's stick to what the Bible actually says. The passage I like best from Gen 4 is God's consoling words to Cain - "If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it." This chapter is first and foremost a cautionary tale against jealousy. Sometimes, just as a matter of arbitrary indiviual taste, a person will favor others over you. Gen 4 is trying to tell us that that's okay. Keep doing good, and you will be approved. "Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny."

Oh wait. Sorry. That last quote was Yoda.

Quotable Quotes: "Am I my brother's keeper?"

Pop References to Gen 4: Whether they know it or not, the band Avenged Sevenfold is referencing Gen 4:15, "if anyone kills Cain, he will suffer vengeance seven times over"

Steinbeck's masterpiece "East of Eden" has many, many references to Gen 4.

GENESIS 3, or, "Oops"

A serpent convices Eve to eat from the forbidden Tree, humans are given the power to tell good from evil, Adam and Eve are banished from the Garden, God becomes majorly POed.

There are two assumptions people make about Gen 3 that aren't actually in the text: That the forbidden fruit from the Tree of knowledge is an apple, and that the serpent in the Garden is the devil. It makes you wonder about how, through time, a non-specific fruit becomes an apple in people's imaginations. A quick Google search tells me that the forbidden fruit has been written about in midrashes and other texts as possibly being several kinds of fruit, including a tomato, though interestingly enough, the apple is not one of the suggestions of the midrash (1). However "in ancient lore the apple had various meanings and were a tempting love fruit with possible sexual overtones" so that is one explanation of why it has stuck (2).

Genesis 3 is about the fall of man. God tells Adam and Eve they can eat from any tree in the Garden except for the Tree of the knowledge between good and evil, because eating fruit from that tree will make them die. A serpent in the garden tells Eve that this is not true, so Eve eats the fruit and shares it with Adam.

God finds out, curses the serpent and kicks Adam and Eve out of the garden. Now they'll have to work to survive, and suffer to give birth to their children.

Something that stood out for me is how Eve eats the fruit not only because it looks appealing, but also because she wanted to gain wisdom. This chapter seems to be telling us that total happiness and the pursuit of wisdom are mutually exclusive things.

How would God want humans to function? As contented yet oblivious automotons? Or as imperfect, complicated and questioning free agents? With my understanding of Christianity being a religion about choosing righteousness over wickedness, positioning that choice at the very center of what it is to be human, doesn't God want us to the latter?

Already, there seems to be a disconnect between what God says and what God has planned. After all, God says that the fruit from the Tree of Knowledge will kill Adam and Eve if eaten. This turns out to be untrue.

Maybe we weren't meant for perfection. And even though God may get angry at us for disobeying Him, our disobedience must have some function in His plan.

Pop references to Gen 3: I didn't see it when it came out, but from the previews, I'm sure that the Darren Aranofsky film "The Fountain" must give a nod to Gen 3. The chapter explains that there are two mystical trees in the Garden: The tree of knowledge, and the tree of life. After God throws Adam and Eve out of the Garden, He guards the tree of everlasting life with cherubim (the plural for cherub, another word for angel) and a flaming sword, so that man will never be able to eat from it and become immortal. From seeing pictures from The Fountain, this must be the movies explaination for the fountain of youth.





1. http://www.shaareytefilla.org/summaries/Bereshit%20Torah.htm
2. http://judaism.about.com/library/3_askrabbi_c/bl_genesis_eden.htm

GENESIS 2, or, "Strategically Placed Leaves are in Fashion This Season"

Doing nothing on the weekend gets invented, the Garden of Eden is erected, God creates man in His own image, then creates woman apparently as an afterthought. "Womyn" to be created thousands of years later.

After a hard six days of creating, God finally rests on the seventh then blesses it. God likes his lazy Sundays as much as anyone.

Even though people are mentioned in Gen 1, we back pedal here to the first man, Adam, whom God creates in his own image, then puts in the Garden of Eden. God tells him he can eat from any of the trees, except for the Tree of the knowledge of good and evil. It's like those episodes of "Curb Your Enthusiam" where Cheryl will say something like, "Now Larry, no matter what you do, DO NOT TOUCH my uncle's urn."

Instead of the Garden of Eden being in some ambiguous mystical place, the Bible is surprisingly specific about where it was located: "A river watering the garden flowed from Eden; from there it was seperated into four headwaters", the four headwaters being the rivers Pishon, Gihon, Tigris, and the Euphratis. That would put the Garden somewhere in Turkey. Why hasn't an Indian Jones movie been made about this yet?

After man is put in the Garden, God tries to find him a companion, trying out various beasts, until finally coming up with the idea of a woman. God takes Adam's rib and creates a woman from it. Ew. Both are naked, but feel no shame.

I'm a little struck by the differences between Gen 1 and Gen 2 about man's creation. In Gen 1, God blesses men, tells them to be fruitful and multiply. But here, he creates one man and one woman. And it's only after they disobey God and get thrown out of the Garden that they are told they will have to toil the Earth and painfully give birth to children. This is slightly less cheery than Gen 1. But I'm getting ahead of myself. By the end of Gen 2, Adam and Eve are happily living in the Garden together, unaware of the fate that awaits them.

Pop References to Gen 2: The movie title "Adam's Rib" (never seen it, but stars Spencer Tracy and Katherine Hepburn). A season 10 episode of "The Simpsons"

GENESIS 1, or, "You Gotta Start Somewhere"

God creates everything in six days, laughs in the face of Big Bang theorists.

Already, I can see that a literal reading of the Bible will be problematic for me. A quick Wikipedia search has informed me that scientists believe that the Big Bang created the universe 13.7 billion years ago, and Earth came about 9 billion years later, emerging out of the solar nebula left over from the creation of our sun. This is a pretty different story from the one Genesis 1 tells us. Why I'm more inclined to believe the scientific facts of Wikipedia (a site that can be edited by anyone, experts or not) over the Bible is a long discussion I'll have to write more about later.

In Buddhism, enlightenment can't be explained, so it is compared to a hand pointing to the moon. If you only focus on the hand, you never see what it's trying to direct your attention to.

I think the Bible can be seen the same way. Too much focus on whether or not the universe was created in six actual days diverts our attention away from the bigger picture. For example, if taken figuratively, one could read into Genesis 1 close parallels with how the scientific community views creation. God creating light and separating it from the darkness could be a poetic way of describing the Big Bang. God creating earth, then animals, then man roughly follows the same timeline Wikipedia lays out for our planet.

On a smaller note, I already caught one contradiction within the text. In Genesis 1, God tells man "I give you every seed-bearing plant on the face of the whole earth and every tree that has fruit with seed in it." This is obviously not true, because in the next chapter, man will be punished for eating the fruit of a certain tree in the Garden of Eden.

Pop References to Gen 1: The song "God Moving Over the Face of the Waters" by Moby is, I assume, a reference to Gen 1:2 - "Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters."

The Bible: What the dealio?

The Bible is a really long book. Because of this, lots of people have never read it (myself included), and yet its contents impact so much of our world.

I've tried reading it in fits and starts, always resolving to get through it from beginning to end. But it's a daunting task. So many begats, archaic cities and unrecognizable names (Zaphnath-paaneah... ZAPHNATH-PAANEAH?!?!?!?)

So I'm going to attempt to read it all the way through. Again. Except this time, I thought it might help to keep a journal as I read, and I thought, why not post it online?

First, a little about me... I have liberal leaning views, so there's a conflict right there. I believe in things like gay marriage and a woman's right to choose. Premarital sex is alright with me, though I respect those who want to wait unitl marriage. I'm a voting Democrat, and I live in LA.

While both my parents and my brother are Catholic, I haven't settled on one religion yet. I have a very strong feeling that there is something bigger than ourselves out there, but I've never been comfortable saying I'm a Christian, because it seems like to say your a Christian means that you believe whole-heartedly everything in the Bible. Since I don't know 99% of what's written in that text, I just can't bring myself to believe it blindly.

I figure that the best way to find out what this whole Christianity thing is about is for me to really sit down and read every word of the Bible. Hopefully, this blog will help me with that.

There's a story in Genesis I know of where Jacob, a descendant of Abraham, is attacked in the desert by an angel. Jacob fights for hours until he's pinned the angel down and demands a blessing, which the angel gives him, along with a new name - Israel.

It's my hope that through reading and analyzing the Bible, really struggling with it, trying to reconcile what it has to tell me with my own beliefs, I'll become a better person for it. Just like Jacob became blessed through his struggle with higher powers.